My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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