Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize