sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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