I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I deserve this hangover.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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