she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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