That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Im part way to drunk.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
