I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
