i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize