i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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