On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
