so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
there was a trapeze. enough said
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
