I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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