Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
she pinky promised me she was 18
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
