Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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