My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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