I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
