quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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