I look better un-naked...
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize