The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she looked like the before picture.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
