Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
