Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
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