It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize
