i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
