i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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