You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize