they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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