Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize