we have pet lesbian snakes
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
