Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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