Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
