If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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