if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize