she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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