Tell her she can't have a vagina
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
