I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
