WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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