Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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