i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
No subtext here. People are naked.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
