i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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