i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
