I've blown a few things in my day
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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