you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
