I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
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Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
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Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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