So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
