Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize