I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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