the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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