did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
