so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
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I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
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I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
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