And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
We are two peas in an std pod
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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